Crazy Landlord's Inspirational Sign

Ha ha ha

2011-02-13T16:45:00.000-08:00

... you're not funny.

ConflictingMessages

2009-09-02T17:18:00.000-07:00

So, let me get this straight. You can be a friend by having a friend, but in doing so, you're making yourself an enemy?

What I love about this the best is, with this being what is on both sides of the sign, if you are heading INTO town, you get the nice "Be a friend" message. if you are heading OUT OF town, you get the sad, depressing "Oh GOD! I hate myself!!" message.

Ahhh, landlord, may your schizophrenic ways NEVER change!

Give Word

2009-08-08T13:37:00.000-07:00

"Later that day, someone stole the letters for "W-O-R-D" ... how ironic that would have been LOL

Incidentally, I think the Crazy landlord has been moonlighting at Subway!

Aren't there laws against that?

Backbone Beats

2009-08-01T19:14:00.000-07:00

... unless you're holding the Ace, King, Queen and Jack of Bones, in which case, Full House, baby!

Laughing Judge

2009-07-29T20:25:00.000-07:00

Oh crap... maybe the landlord is on to my little blog! Maybe he's been reading it all along!
HEY! LANDLORD! Use the word "Duty" in one of your future signs, ok? That would make me laugh all right!

... heh heh ... "duty" ..... heh heh "diarrhea" ... heh heh

Winning Smile

2009-07-26T16:57:00.000-07:00

This would beg the question, if a quitter smiles winningly, does he lose? ACK! PARADOX!

Quit Winning!

2009-07-24T07:43:00.000-07:00

Not to quite "Mystery Men" but....

Mr. Furious: Okay, am I the only one who finds these sayings just a little bit formulaic? "If you want to push something down, you have to pull it up. If you want to go left, you have to go right." It's...
The Sphinx: Your temper is very quick, my friend. But until you learn to master your rage...
Mr. Furious: ...your rage will become your master? That's what you were going to say. Right? Right?
The Sphinx: Not necessarily.

Smile Language

2009-07-21T21:42:00.000-07:00

...with some exceptions.
1. If you're a pervert, it's "Pervert-ian".
2. If you visit the dentist once every ten years, it's "Disgusting-ish".
2. If it's directed at a blind person, it would be "Retard-ese".

Fuel-Care

2009-07-11T12:38:00.000-07:00

The only way this sign could be better is if the gas station behind it were on fire.
*Mental note : Remember to buy a birthday present for the jerry can of kerosene out back.

OMGWTFBBQ

2009-07-08T11:50:00.000-07:00

Wow! Really? So, I guess I should take the BBQ out of the bathroom, eh? Aw man! And I was SO looking forward to eating hamburgers while I poo!

Patience

2009-06-25T17:28:00.000-07:00

So, my Landlord is crazy. Here's the short story. About a year ago, I moved from the downstairs apartment to the upstairs apartment. In doing so, my landlord spent an extra 2 weeks fixing up the place after I moved in. Basically, my stuff was there, but he had occupied little corners of the apartment with his "things" ... notepads (he was apparently a volunteer fireman, in charge of ... changing the sign outside the firehall?), tupperware dishes of his lunches. Now, I always knew he was crazy, ever since I had asked about the thermostat one day and why it didn't seem to work. He told me, straight-faced of course, that the wall fixtures, like the thermostat and the light switches needed to be "Oxidated" in order for them to function properly, even going so far as to inform me he had a special can of "Oxidizing sspray" he planned to spray all the fixtures with (What, air?)
But I never knew just how crazy he was until I found, amongst the little notes to fix this or that and the soiled lunch dishes, a pill box, with anti-depressants.
After this discovery, I started to notice how frigged up his little messages on the firehall sign were. Yup, first sign I read after finding his little stash of happy pills simply stated "Enjoy Hobbies"... that's it. Nothing else. how nice. A psycho.
Anyways, this will be my attempt to capture how inspirational a depressed volunteer fireman can try to cheer up a whole community with his thoughtful messages!

Ohhhhhhh! I see what you did there, Mister Landlord! You played with the word "wait", so it would have a double meaning! DAMN you're smart!

(Well, either smart or he has an Uncle Johns bathroom Reader in the firehall washroom...)